<?xml version="1.0" encoding="utf-8"?>
<feed xmlns="http://www.w3.org/2005/Atom">
    <title>ILikeJam</title>
    <link rel="alternate" type="text/html" href="http://www.ilikejam.org/blog/" />
    <link rel="self" type="application/atom+xml" href="http://www.ilikejam.org/blog/atom.xml" />
    <id>tag:www.ilikejam.org,2007-12-16:/blog//1</id>
    <updated>2010-05-30T22:45:45Z</updated>
    <subtitle>Attaching the electrodes of knowledge to the nipples of ignorance since 1999</subtitle>
    <generator uri="http://www.sixapart.com/movabletype/">Movable Type 4.31-en</generator>

<entry>
    <title>The Curry</title>
    <link rel="alternate" type="text/html" href="http://www.ilikejam.org/blog/2010/05/the-curry.html" />
    <id>tag:www.ilikejam.org,2010:/blog//1.343</id>

    <published>2010-05-23T20:58:17Z</published>
    <updated>2010-05-30T22:45:45Z</updated>

    <summary>Here&apos;s the recipe for the awesome, tasty, blows your head clean off ILikeJam curry sauce. Should be enough to put 4 idiots into respiratory arrest. You&apos;ll need: 80g ginger 6 green chillies 3 bird-eye chillies 4 fat cloves of garlic...</summary>
    <author>
        <name>Dave Stark</name>
        <uri>http://www.ilikejam.org</uri>
    </author>
    
    <category term="curry" label="curry" scheme="http://www.sixapart.com/ns/types#tag" />
    <category term="food" label="food" scheme="http://www.sixapart.com/ns/types#tag" />
    <category term="idiots" label="idiots" scheme="http://www.sixapart.com/ns/types#tag" />
    
    <content type="html" xml:lang="en" xml:base="http://www.ilikejam.org/blog/">
        <![CDATA[<p>Here's the recipe for the awesome, tasty, blows your head clean off ILikeJam curry sauce.
</p>
<p>Should be enough to put 4 idiots into respiratory arrest.
</p>
<p>You'll need:
<ul>
<li>80g ginger
<li>6 green chillies
<li>3 bird-eye chillies
<li>4 fat cloves of garlic
<li>A tin of peeled plum tomatoes
<li>A fat onion
<li>4 tbsp ground nut oil
<li>2 tsp cumin
<li>1 tsp salt
<li>1/2 tsp chilli powder
<li>1/2 tsp cayenne pepper
<li>2 tsp turmeric
<li>2 tsp garam masala
<li>1 1/2 tbsp tomato puree
</ul>
</p>
<p>Shove the ginger, all the chillies (seeds included - no messing about) and garlic in a blender and blend to a paste. Transfer that dangerous shit into a bowl before it dissolves the blender blades.<br />
Drain the tinned tomatoes and stick them in the blender. Give the button a few hits - you want a bit of texture left. Put the resulting slop in the bowl with the previously blended stuff.<br />
Chop your onion.<br />
Grab a pot and throw in the chopped onion and oil. Fry those tasty bits of onion fairly slowly 'til they're soft. Chuck the cumin in and stir, then give it a bit more frying time.<br />
Add the chillies/tomato/etc to the onion and stir until it's venting noxious fumes. Keep stirring and add the salt, chilli powder, cayenne, turmeric and garam masala, then the tomato puree.<br />
Stir some more.<br />
Turn the heat down and keep the concoction simmering until you get bored or the anti-terror squad come round looking for a chemical weapons factory - the longer it simmers the better it gets. Add water if/when it dries out.<br />
Turn the heat off and let that nonsense chill out for a while. Once it's safe(r) to handle, spoon it into freezer bags and freeze it. You can use it straight away if you want, but it's maybe 20% more panic-inducing after it's been frozen. So do that.<br />
</p>
<p>To unleash the fear, defrost the sauce and chuck in some chunks of chicken breast. Simmer for 15 minutes or so. If you're feeling particularly hardcore, finely slice another couple of bird-eye chillies and throw those bad boys in there.<br />
Serve with rice and a well rehearsed safety briefing.
</p>]]>
        
    </content>
</entry>

<entry>
    <title>Mini</title>
    <link rel="alternate" type="text/html" href="http://www.ilikejam.org/blog/2010/03/mini.html" />
    <id>tag:www.ilikejam.org,2010:/blog//1.342</id>

    <published>2010-03-15T21:57:03Z</published>
    <updated>2010-03-15T23:57:38Z</updated>

    <summary>My ancient Thinkpad died a few days ago. A moment&apos;s silence, if you please. ... Thank you. Being largely skint, I grabbed myself the cheapest netbook going. A Dell Mini 10v. It&apos;s awesome. The screen&apos;s razor sharp, the keyboard&apos;s satisfyingly...</summary>
    <author>
        <name>Dave Stark</name>
        <uri>http://www.ilikejam.org</uri>
    </author>
    
        <category term="Unix" scheme="http://www.sixapart.com/ns/types#category" />
    
    <category term="fedora" label="fedora" scheme="http://www.sixapart.com/ns/types#tag" />
    <category term="netbook" label="netbook" scheme="http://www.sixapart.com/ns/types#tag" />
    <category term="unix" label="unix" scheme="http://www.sixapart.com/ns/types#tag" />
    
    <content type="html" xml:lang="en" xml:base="http://www.ilikejam.org/blog/">
        <![CDATA[<p>My ancient <a href="http://www.thinkwiki.org/wiki/Category:A20m">Thinkpad</a> died a few days ago. A moment's silence, if you please.
</p>
<p>...
</p>
</p>Thank you.
</p>
<p>Being largely skint, I grabbed myself the cheapest netbook going. A <a href="http://www.reghardware.co.uk/2009/06/29/review_netbook_dell_inspiron_mini_10v/">Dell Mini 10v</a>. It's awesome. The screen's razor sharp, the keyboard's satisfyingly clacky, and it's really well put together.<br />
Being of the RedHat persuasion, the installed <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ubuntu_Netbook_Edition">Ubuntu</a> OS survived exactly one boot before being replaced by the mighty <a href="http://fedoraproject.org/">Fedora</a>.
</p>
An 8GB USB drive and <a href="http://forums.fedoraforum.org/showpost.php?p=1235298&amp;postcount=111">these instructions</a> got it up and running. The default Fedora <a href="http://www.ioncannon.net/projects/miscellaneous-projects/fedora-12-screenshots-and-videos/">Gnome</a> desktop's <em>surprisingly</em> light on RAM and everything Just Works. A couple of tweaks, though, because that's the way I roll...
</p>
<p><ul>
<li>Get the binary WiFi drivers:
<br /><tt>$ su -</tt>
<br /><tt># rpm -Uvh http://download1.rpmfusion.org/free/fedora/rpmfusion-free-release-stable.noarch.rpm http://download1.rpmfusion.org/nonfree/fedora/rpmfusion-nonfree-release-stable.noarch.rpm</tt>
<br /><tt># yum -y update</tt>
<br /><tt># yum -y install kmod-wl broadcom-wl</tt>
<li>Tweak PulseAudio so it doesn't use so much CPU:
<br /><tt>$ su -</tt>
<br /><tt># sed -i 's/; resample-method = speex-float-3/resample-method = speex-float-0/' /etc/pulse/daemon.conf</tt>
</ul></p>
<p>That's about it, really. Install Flash at your leisure and enjoy full-screen YouTube, iPlayer et al.
</p>
<p>There's only one thing wrong with this netbook, and that's the touchpad. The buttons are under the pad, but the areas over the buttons are touch-sensitive, so you can't drag and drop without the pointer flying off in all directions. This isn't a problem that's particular to Linux - Windows 7 users (XP as well, I'd imagine) are reporting the same problem. If you run Linux, though, you get to talk to the developers and raise bug reports. So that's what I <a href="https://bugzilla.redhat.com/show_bug.cgi?id=573463">did</a>. We'll see how it pans out.
</p>
</p>]]>
        
    </content>
</entry>

<entry>
    <title>Sign it</title>
    <link rel="alternate" type="text/html" href="http://www.ilikejam.org/blog/2009/11/sign-it.html" />
    <id>tag:www.ilikejam.org,2009:/blog//1.341</id>

    <published>2009-11-24T16:54:33Z</published>
    <updated>2009-11-24T16:55:45Z</updated>

    <summary>http://petitions.number10.gov.uk/dontdisconnectus/ Go on. You know you want to....</summary>
    <author>
        <name>Dave Stark</name>
        <uri>http://www.ilikejam.org</uri>
    </author>
    
    <category term="politics" label="politics" scheme="http://www.sixapart.com/ns/types#tag" />
    
    <content type="html" xml:lang="en" xml:base="http://www.ilikejam.org/blog/">
        <![CDATA[<p><a href="http://petitions.number10.gov.uk/dontdisconnectus/">http://petitions.number10.gov.uk/dontdisconnectus/</a>
<br />
Go on. You know you want to.
</p>]]>
        
    </content>
</entry>

<entry>
    <title>LDAP Headfuck</title>
    <link rel="alternate" type="text/html" href="http://www.ilikejam.org/blog/2009/11/ldap-headfuck.html" />
    <id>tag:www.ilikejam.org,2009:/blog//1.340</id>

    <published>2009-11-12T20:09:06Z</published>
    <updated>2009-11-12T22:13:07Z</updated>

    <summary>LDAP: Largely Dangerous And Painful. Let me describe why. (Normal people can give this one a miss. Fellow sysadmins can revel in the ridiculousness). I&apos;m in the middle of putting an LDAP infrastructure together, and rolling it out to 40-odd...</summary>
    <author>
        <name>Dave Stark</name>
        <uri>http://www.ilikejam.org</uri>
    </author>
    
        <category term="Unix" scheme="http://www.sixapart.com/ns/types#category" />
    
    <category term="ldap" label="LDAP" scheme="http://www.sixapart.com/ns/types#tag" />
    <category term="security" label="security" scheme="http://www.sixapart.com/ns/types#tag" />
    <category term="solaris" label="solaris" scheme="http://www.sixapart.com/ns/types#tag" />
    
    <content type="html" xml:lang="en" xml:base="http://www.ilikejam.org/blog/">
        <![CDATA[<p><a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Lightweight_Directory_Access_Protocol">LDAP</a>: Largely Dangerous And <a href="http://www.google.com/search?hl=en&q=%2Bldap+%2B%22pain+in+the+ass%22&aq=f&oq=&aqi=">Painful</a>. Let me describe why. (Normal people can give this one a miss. Fellow sysadmins can revel in the ridiculousness).
</p>
<p>I'm in the middle of putting an LDAP infrastructure together, and rolling it out to 40-odd Solaris boxes for user authentication, NFS auto mounts, sudo and all that good stuff. Our consultant/contractor/architect worships at the alter of the Sun gods, so <a href="http://www.opends.org/">OpenDS</a> 1.2.0 was his choice of LDAP server. Not a bad choice, to be honest - it's a piece of piss to set up and get multiple servers multi-master replicating, and it's Free.
<br />
All was tickety-boo until a week ago.
</p>
<p>First up, all 4 replicating LDAP servers hung overnight. This locked out the admin team from half of our machines until I got into work and poked them back into life. No errors in the logs, nothing weird going on, just hung Java processes and no logins. Brought down 2 of the instances and upgraded the other two to OpenDS 2.0 so hopefully that should be the end of that. Hopefully. Maybe.
</p>
<p>Then today, I'm happily LDAPing away when I ran an ldapmodify to change the UID of the user that runs out monitoring software. LDIF imported, no problem, except I'd run the ldapmodify binding as the user I was modifying, not the Directory Manager. Alarm bells went off in my head - users shouldn't be able to modify their own UID numbers. I tried it again, using 0 as the UID, and sure enough it turns out that anyone that could authenticate to LDAP could also change their UID so that they were running as root. Fuck me very hard indeed. A very swift google tipped up an ACL to add to stop this, as well as a whole load of other possible nightmares.
</p>
<p>Next, while messing with the ACLs for the UID problem, it occurred to me that the 'proxy' user could see everyone's passwords in the directory. This is by design, since we're using proxy authentication on our Solaris hosts (which means user passwords aren't sent over the network in plaintext), but it also means that anyone logged into any LDAP-enabled Sun box can search for and list everyone in the directory's passwords with a simple 'ldaplist -l passwd'. The passwords are encrypted, but the old-skool Unix 'crypt' isn't exactly what you'd call military grade protection. Shit.
<br />
To get round this, I'm currently beating my head against the brick wall of TLS/SSL so we can remove the need for a proxy user. The tools supplied with OpenDS work fine, but the native Solaris stuff won't go near the self-signed certificates we're using (either that or I'm Doing It Wrong, I'm not entirely sure yet). I've given up for the night, but it looks like I'm going to have to generate CA certificates, then regenerate and sign all the certs for the LDAP servers, then import them,  then import the CA and server certs into the LDAP config on the clients, then see if the native Solaris stuff works with them, then re-run ldapclient on all the clients. Arse.
</p>
<p>I don't get paid enough for this.
</p>]]>
        
    </content>
</entry>

<entry>
    <title>Mandy</title>
    <link rel="alternate" type="text/html" href="http://www.ilikejam.org/blog/2009/10/mandy.html" />
    <id>tag:www.ilikejam.org,2009:/blog//1.339</id>

    <published>2009-10-28T20:12:28Z</published>
    <updated>2010-01-02T10:44:26Z</updated>

    <summary>Hey, Mandelson, could you perhaps fuck off please? Thanks. While we&apos;re at it... &quot;...speaking at the government&apos;s C&amp;binet conference...&quot; C&amp;binet? Candbinet? What&apos;s a candbinet? Jesus. These idiots couldn&apos;t even come up with a name that makes sense, never mind some...</summary>
    <author>
        <name>Dave Stark</name>
        <uri>http://www.ilikejam.org</uri>
    </author>
    
    <category term="idiots" label="idiots" scheme="http://www.sixapart.com/ns/types#tag" />
    <category term="politics" label="politics" scheme="http://www.sixapart.com/ns/types#tag" />
    
    <content type="html" xml:lang="en" xml:base="http://www.ilikejam.org/blog/">
        <![CDATA[<p>Hey, Mandelson, could you perhaps <a href="http://www.theregister.co.uk/2009/10/28/mandelson_three_strikes_file_sharing_clamp_down/">fuck off</a> please? Thanks.
</p>
<p>While we're at it...<br />
<em>"...speaking at the government's C&binet conference..."</em><br />
C&binet? Candbinet? What's a candbinet? Jesus. These idiots couldn't even come up with a <em>name</em> that makes sense, never mind some reasonable policies.<br />
</p>
<p>Hat-tip to an <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Anonymous_Coward">Anonymous Coward</a> at <a href="http://slashdot.org">Slashdot</a> who simply posted: "Lord Fondlebum of Boy".
</p>]]>
        
    </content>
</entry>

<entry>
    <title>Ultimate Pizza</title>
    <link rel="alternate" type="text/html" href="http://www.ilikejam.org/blog/2009/10/ultimate-pizza.html" />
    <id>tag:www.ilikejam.org,2009:/blog//1.338</id>

    <published>2009-10-25T23:38:45Z</published>
    <updated>2009-10-25T23:48:13Z</updated>

    <summary>Get yo&apos; ass to dominos.co.uk, and construct yo&apos; ass one of these: - Regular base - Pizza sauce - Domino&apos;s Herbs - Green Peppers - Olives - Roquito Sweet Chilli Peppers - Tandoori Chicken - Jalapeno Peppers - Onions -...</summary>
    <author>
        <name>Dave Stark</name>
        <uri>http://www.ilikejam.org</uri>
    </author>
    
    <category term="awesome" label="awesome" scheme="http://www.sixapart.com/ns/types#tag" />
    <category term="pizza" label="pizza" scheme="http://www.sixapart.com/ns/types#tag" />
    
    <content type="html" xml:lang="en" xml:base="http://www.ilikejam.org/blog/">
        <![CDATA[<p>Get yo' ass to dominos.co.uk, and construct yo' ass one of these:<br />
- Regular base<br />
- Pizza sauce<br />
- Domino's Herbs<br />
- Green Peppers<br />
- Olives<br />
- Roquito Sweet Chilli Peppers<br />
- Tandoori Chicken<br />
- Jalapeno Peppers<br />
- Onions<br />
- Pepperoni<br />
</p>
<p>Do it. Do it now. OM NOM NOM NOM.
</p>
<p>And don't forget to tip your delivery guy.
</p>]]>
        
    </content>
</entry>

<entry>
    <title>Toof</title>
    <link rel="alternate" type="text/html" href="http://www.ilikejam.org/blog/2009/10/wisdom.html" />
    <id>tag:www.ilikejam.org,2009:/blog//1.337</id>

    <published>2009-10-23T22:41:03Z</published>
    <updated>2009-10-24T00:22:17Z</updated>

    <summary>I had a tooth removed recently. Contrary to received wisdom*, the whole procedure was completely painless and largely unremarkable. Things of note: 1) When your dentist goes &quot;Hmmm.&quot; during a procedure, and invites one of his colleagues to join the...</summary>
    <author>
        <name>Dave Stark</name>
        <uri>http://www.ilikejam.org</uri>
    </author>
    
    <category term="dentist" label="dentist" scheme="http://www.sixapart.com/ns/types#tag" />
    <category term="weird" label="weird" scheme="http://www.sixapart.com/ns/types#tag" />
    
    <content type="html" xml:lang="en" xml:base="http://www.ilikejam.org/blog/">
        <![CDATA[<p>I had a tooth removed recently. Contrary to received wisdom*, the whole procedure was completely painless and <em>largely</em> unremarkable.
</p>
<p>Things of note:<br />
1)  When your dentist goes "Hmmm." during a procedure, and invites one of his colleagues to join the ongoing mouth-party, this is not, I am told, cause for alarm. Contrary to the prevailing advice, I chose to become <em>entirely</em> (albeit very <em>quietly</em>) alarmed.<br />
2) Your Dental Specialist may hide the various implements of healing behind his or her back until <em>just</em> before they are to be used. These implements may or may not include:<br />
Large syringes<br />
Well-worn pliars<br />
Blood-filled suction tubes<br />
I'm not entirely certain that this behaviour is normal, however. The furtive yet swift nature in which my dentists work leads me to believe that I've stumbled on a clique of <em>ninja</em> health professionals. I'm expecting a re-enactment of the Shimabara rebellion at the next check-up.<br />
3) Rinsing the resulting casm in your jaw with salt-water according to instruction is entirely ineffective; expect to poke about in there with a toothpick to retrieve horrifying globs of <em>matter</em>, lest your breath become the subject of future Germanic fairy tales.
</p>
<p>That's my experience anyway. Your milage may, as ever, vary.
</p>
<p>While we're on the subject, check <a href="http://mymilktoof.blogspot.com/">this</a> out. Awesome.
<p><small>* - Yeah,  I'm fucking hilarious.</small>
</p>]]>
        
    </content>
</entry>

<entry>
    <title>CC+02</title>
    <link rel="alternate" type="text/html" href="http://www.ilikejam.org/blog/2009/10/cc02.html" />
    <id>tag:www.ilikejam.org,2009:/blog//1.336</id>

    <published>2009-10-23T22:23:52Z</published>
    <updated>2009-10-24T00:25:28Z</updated>

    <summary>PROTIP: Credit cards are self-extinguishing. I don&apos;t know what they&apos;re made of, but they won&apos;t burn without continuous provocation. Sinister....</summary>
    <author>
        <name>Dave Stark</name>
        <uri>http://www.ilikejam.org</uri>
    </author>
    
    <category term="money" label="money" scheme="http://www.sixapart.com/ns/types#tag" />
    <category term="weird" label="weird" scheme="http://www.sixapart.com/ns/types#tag" />
    
    <content type="html" xml:lang="en" xml:base="http://www.ilikejam.org/blog/">
        <![CDATA[<p>PROTIP:<br />
Credit cards are self-extinguishing.
</p>
<p>I don't know what they're made of, but they won't burn without <em>continuous</em> provocation. Sinister.
</p>]]>
        
    </content>
</entry>

<entry>
    <title>Emulex HBAs</title>
    <link rel="alternate" type="text/html" href="http://www.ilikejam.org/blog/2009/10/emulex-hbas.html" />
    <id>tag:www.ilikejam.org,2009:/blog//1.334</id>

    <published>2009-10-15T18:49:13Z</published>
    <updated>2009-10-15T19:53:50Z</updated>

    <summary>Let&apos;s say you&apos;ve just added an Emulex FC HBA or two to your Solaris box. Let&apos;s also say that you booted the machine before you hooked up the fibre, zoned the switch and presented some storage. Having trouble? Can&apos;t see...</summary>
    <author>
        <name>Dave Stark</name>
        <uri>http://www.ilikejam.org</uri>
    </author>
    
    <category term="solaris" label="solaris" scheme="http://www.sixapart.com/ns/types#tag" />
    <category term="storage" label="storage" scheme="http://www.sixapart.com/ns/types#tag" />
    <category term="unix" label="unix" scheme="http://www.sixapart.com/ns/types#tag" />
    
    <content type="html" xml:lang="en" xml:base="http://www.ilikejam.org/blog/">
        <![CDATA[<p>Let's say you've just added an Emulex FC HBA or two to your Solaris box. Let's also say that you booted the machine before you hooked up the fibre, zoned the switch and presented some storage.</p>
<p>Having trouble? Can't see your storage? Does your 'cfgadm -al' output look like this:</p>
<p><pre>c11     fc-fabric    connected    unconfigured   unknown</pre></p>
<p>Yeah, me too. Turns out the Emulex cards are a bit shy. You can poke them into life with the following:</p>
<p><pre>luxadm -e forcelip /dev/cfg/c11</pre></p>
<p>Change the c11 to whatever the device ID is for your card.</p>
<p>Tread carefully fellow admins - don't do this on an HBA that's already handling mounted storage - it resets all the ports on the loop, so you might lose sight of your storage for a second or two.</p>
<p>Never had to do any of this with QLogic cards...</p>]]>
        
    </content>
</entry>

<entry>
    <title>FEMALE PREFERRED</title>
    <link rel="alternate" type="text/html" href="http://www.ilikejam.org/blog/2009/09/female-preferred.html" />
    <id>tag:www.ilikejam.org,2009:/blog//1.333</id>

    <published>2009-09-12T16:39:34Z</published>
    <updated>2009-09-12T20:44:42Z</updated>

    <summary>Just got a photocopied 1/4 A4 flyer through the door. It&apos;s got a staple at the top but it&apos;s only one page, so I&apos;m going to assume there&apos;s something missing. Here&apos;s what the bit I got says: FEMALE PREFERRED -...</summary>
    <author>
        <name>Dave Stark</name>
        <uri>http://www.ilikejam.org</uri>
    </author>
    
    <category term="weird" label="weird" scheme="http://www.sixapart.com/ns/types#tag" />
    
    <content type="html" xml:lang="en" xml:base="http://www.ilikejam.org/blog/">
        <![CDATA[<p>Just got a photocopied 1/4 A4 flyer through the door. It's got a staple at the top but it's only one page, so I'm going to assume there's <em>something</em> missing. Here's what the bit I got says:</p>
<p>FEMALE PREFERRED -<br />
SHOULD BE TALL AND<br />
VERY STRONG AS YOU<br />
WILL HAVE TO CARRY<br />
A SIZEABLE CASE - BUT<br />
THAT IS 50% OF WHAT<br />
I'M PAYING YOU FOR.</p>
<p>What's going on here? What's the other 50% of what (s)he's paying you for? What's in the case? Guesses in the comments, if you would.</p>]]>
        
    </content>
</entry>

<entry>
    <title>On tour</title>
    <link rel="alternate" type="text/html" href="http://www.ilikejam.org/blog/2009/09/on-tour.html" />
    <id>tag:www.ilikejam.org,2009:/blog//1.332</id>

    <published>2009-09-07T21:06:29Z</published>
    <updated>2009-09-07T22:05:21Z</updated>

    <summary>Flights are booked for Orbital at the Brixton Academy. It&apos;s gonna be epic. Epic, I say. Now, I fucking hate flying. Sitting in an aluminium tube (1mm thick! No, I&apos;m not joking!), 6 miles up, doing 500mph, features prominently on...</summary>
    <author>
        <name>Dave Stark</name>
        <uri>http://www.ilikejam.org</uri>
    </author>
    
    <category term="flying" label="flying" scheme="http://www.sixapart.com/ns/types#tag" />
    <category term="orbital" label="orbital" scheme="http://www.sixapart.com/ns/types#tag" />
    
    <content type="html" xml:lang="en" xml:base="http://www.ilikejam.org/blog/">
        <![CDATA[<p>Flights are booked for Orbital at the Brixton Academy. It's gonna be epic. Epic, I say.
</p>
<p>Now, I <em>fucking hate</em> flying. Sitting in an aluminium tube (1mm thick! No, I'm <a href="http://www.arff.info/forums/showthread.php?t=2490">not joking</a>!), 6 miles up, doing 500mph, features prominently on my list of Things I Don't Like Doing. It's really pretty high on that list. Just above 'flying' on the list, though, is 'sitting in a GNER shithole-on-rails for 5 hours next to a cantankerous old twat that complains every time he hears the slightest "tsss" from my headphones', so I'll risk the potential explosive-decompression 30,000 foot free-fall inferno death, thanks.
</p>]]>
        
    </content>
</entry>

<entry>
    <title>Scoobied</title>
    <link rel="alternate" type="text/html" href="http://www.ilikejam.org/blog/2009/08/scoobied.html" />
    <id>tag:www.ilikejam.org,2009:/blog//1.331</id>

    <published>2009-08-16T17:57:02Z</published>
    <updated>2009-08-29T16:58:52Z</updated>

    <summary>The legendary Scooby Snack on This is why you&apos;re fat. Doesn&apos;t really look all that bad compared with the rest of it...</summary>
    <author>
        <name>Dave Stark</name>
        <uri>http://www.ilikejam.org</uri>
    </author>
    
    <category term="food" label="food" scheme="http://www.sixapart.com/ns/types#tag" />
    
    <content type="html" xml:lang="en" xml:base="http://www.ilikejam.org/blog/">
        <![CDATA[<p>The legendary Scooby Snack on <a href="http://thisiswhyyourefat.com/post/146145742/the-scooby-snack-a-hamburger-patty-topped-with-a">This is why you're fat</a>.
<br />Doesn't really look all that bad compared with <a href="http://thisiswhyyourefat.com/">the rest of it</a></p>]]>
        
    </content>
</entry>

<entry>
    <title>The end of an Athlon</title>
    <link rel="alternate" type="text/html" href="http://www.ilikejam.org/blog/2009/07/the-end-of-an-athlon.html" />
    <id>tag:www.ilikejam.org,2009:/blog//1.330</id>

    <published>2009-07-21T12:05:14Z</published>
    <updated>2009-07-21T15:04:23Z</updated>

    <summary>Woke up this morning to the sound of silence. No TV. No fans. No hard drives. Nothing (except my brother&apos;s cat trying to re-arrange the carpet). Arse. My ancient Athlon PC has finally booted its bucket. I suppose it&apos;s been...</summary>
    <author>
        <name>Dave Stark</name>
        <uri>http://www.ilikejam.org</uri>
    </author>
    
        <category term="Unix" scheme="http://www.sixapart.com/ns/types#category" />
    
    <category term="annoying" label="annoying" scheme="http://www.sixapart.com/ns/types#tag" />
    <category term="dead" label="dead" scheme="http://www.sixapart.com/ns/types#tag" />
    <category term="pc" label="PC" scheme="http://www.sixapart.com/ns/types#tag" />
    <category term="unix" label="unix" scheme="http://www.sixapart.com/ns/types#tag" />
    
    <content type="html" xml:lang="en" xml:base="http://www.ilikejam.org/blog/">
        <![CDATA[<p>Woke up this morning to the sound of silence.
<br />No TV.
<br />No fans.
<br />No hard drives.
<br />Nothing (except my brother's cat trying to re-arrange the carpet). 
<br />Arse. My ancient Athlon PC has finally booted its bucket. I suppose it's been a bit flaky of late - USB devices disconnecting randomly, video card spluttering occasionally, that sort of thing. Now it gives only a forlorn "beeeeeeeeep" when it's powered up, and it promptly switches itself off again. Maybe it achieved sentience during the night, watched News24 for a while (I think that's what was on when I fell asleep) and decided that this isn't a world it wants to be part of.
<br />Or maybe one of the caps on the motherboard went out of tolerance and hosed the processor. We'll never know.
</p>
<p>Anyway, all the motherboard connections have changed since the Athlon XP days, so I'm having to replace pretty much everything. Here's the run-down:
<br />Intel Core 2 Duo E7400 Processor
<br />Asus P5QL SE S775 Motherboard
<br />2GB Kingston RAM
<br />NVidia 9500GT 1GB Video Card
<br />250GB Seagate Barracuda Hard Drive
<br />Akasa Ultra Quiet 460w Power Supply
<br />I'm keeping my Lian Li case, the two CD/DVD drives, and my trusty Trinifuckinghugetron Sun monitor (1600x1200 of glorious ).
</p>
<p>Total: 300 quid delivered. None too shabby. Can't really afford it, but still, none too shabby. Yes, the video card's weak and 2GB RAM isn't that much these days, but Unreal 2004 is about the most graphics intensive game I play, and Linux is pretty light on RAM. Hell, the old machine only had 1/2GB RAM and a GeForce 5200, fortheloveofgod.
</p>]]>
        
    </content>
</entry>

<entry>
    <title>Malicious Accommodation</title>
    <link rel="alternate" type="text/html" href="http://www.ilikejam.org/blog/2009/06/malicious-accommodation.html" />
    <id>tag:www.ilikejam.org,2009:/blog//1.329</id>

    <published>2009-06-29T18:25:41Z</published>
    <updated>2009-06-29T19:12:06Z</updated>

    <summary>My flat&apos;s trying to kill me. Exactly a year ago, when I first moved in, my heavy-as-fuck blinds came off their hilariously flimsy mounts and attempted to remove my right arm on the way down. That time my shoulder popped...</summary>
    <author>
        <name>Dave Stark</name>
        <uri>http://www.ilikejam.org</uri>
    </author>
    
    <category term="flats" label="flats" scheme="http://www.sixapart.com/ns/types#tag" />
    <category term="pain" label="pain" scheme="http://www.sixapart.com/ns/types#tag" />
    
    <content type="html" xml:lang="en" xml:base="http://www.ilikejam.org/blog/">
        <![CDATA[<p>My flat's trying to kill me.
</p>
<p>Exactly a year ago, when I first moved in, my heavy-as-fuck blinds came off their hilariously flimsy mounts and attempted to remove my right arm on the way down. That time my shoulder popped out and back in again, resulting in only temporary pain and resentment.
<br/>
On Saturday night, exactly the same thing happened, but the pain and resentment has persisted. A mortal blow was also delivered to my long-suffering dragon tree, and my equally long-suffering speakers have received injuries that may require plastic surgery.
</p>
<p>Balls to the tree and speakers, though. My shoulder's gubbed, so I'm heading to the venerable family GP to demand satisfaction. Or whatever he recommends. The mouse-to-keyboard-and-back arm-rotation is now accompanied by a painful 'clunk', so I'm slightly concerned that this might end up being a real problem what with my profession and all. I can see it putting a dent in my sex life anyway, if you know what I mean. And I think you do.
</p>
<p>It's probably worth noting that both of my shoulders are what I believe is termed <a href="http://www.eorthopod.com/public/patient_education/6538/shoulder_instability.html">unstable</a>, so this was going to happen sooner or later. Actually, my knee used to do the same pop-out-and-back routine as well so I'm guessing it's congenital, and therefore my parents' fault more than my flat's. (If you want to experience pain and panic in equal and very large doses, I can recommend trying to straighten out a partially dislocated knee every time - popped shoulders are a definitely piece of piss in comparison.)
</p>
<p>On a lighter note, the Sub was all kinds of excellent on Saturday (before the attempted dismemberment) - Domenic's back from Barcelona for good, and he's chucking around some fine quality House.
</p>]]>
        
    </content>
</entry>

<entry>
    <title>Twitter</title>
    <link rel="alternate" type="text/html" href="http://www.ilikejam.org/blog/2009/04/twitter.html" />
    <id>tag:www.ilikejam.org,2009:/blog//1.328</id>

    <published>2009-04-28T22:47:24Z</published>
    <updated>2009-04-28T22:55:36Z</updated>

    <summary>I&apos;m on Twitter now. I held off for so long, but the thought of being able to shout into the abyss on yet another website was just too much temptation. That, and I wanted to see what Stephen Fry had...</summary>
    <author>
        <name>Dave Stark</name>
        <uri>http://www.ilikejam.org</uri>
    </author>
    
    
    <content type="html" xml:lang="en" xml:base="http://www.ilikejam.org/blog/">
        <![CDATA[<p>I'm <a href="http://twitter.com/ilikejam">on Twitter</a> now. I held off for so long, but the thought of being able to shout into the abyss on yet another website was just too much temptation. That, and I wanted to see what <a href="http://twitter.com/stephenfry">Stephen Fry</a> had for breakfast.
</p>]]>
        
    </content>
</entry>

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